Why are men less happy than women?

Why are men less happy than women?

Last week was not a good one for British men.

Two major papers released by the ONS drew dark clouds over our heads. First came the annual suicide statistics, which revealed that men are still more than three times as likely as women to take their own lives.

And then there was the so-called 'happiness survey'. In amongst all the granular data was one starkly general fact: on average, men are less happy than women. Ouch. 

Prince Andrei is perpetually down in War and Peace CREDIT: BBC

The reaction to these revelations focused on social justifications, such as the perceived inability of men to articulate and deal with their worries. But could it be that men are less happy than womenbecause we are born this way?

Dr Alberto Pertusa, a Consultant Psychiatrist and mental health researcher with the Cambian Group, suggests as much. He believes that, whilst small, the biological differences in how male and female brains are wired may explain significant disparities in gender behaviour, such as our capacities to feel happiness.

 "Both sexes have, according to research in both neuroimaging and mirror neurons, the same ability to show empathy, to identify and experience our own and others’ emotions," says Dr Pertusa. "However, it appears that it is easier for men to ‘suppress' this emotional response. This is believed to have an evolutionary advantage that stems from our Palaeolithic ancestors having to overcome their emotional or fearful response when hunting or fighting.

Dr Pertusa explains how men can surpress emotion more effectively than womenCREDIT: ALAMY

 "There are also functional differences between sexes in response to emotional stimuli," the psychiatrist adds. "The amygdala – a brain structure involved in emotional processing, particularly in fear – appears to be differentially engaged in men and women depending on situation or context."

Dr Pertusa also points to discrepancies in the way gendered hormones affect neural circuits as a possible cause of the happiness divide – a line of thinking that resonates with the work of neuroendocrinologist Dr Bruce McEwen, of New York City’s Rockefeller University, who has previously posited that sex hormones play a part in how each gender copes with emotion.

McEwen's research found that estradiol – the primary female sex hormone – is used in the brain to respond to stress by swelling synapses and creating more neural connections. In men, however – where estradiol is lacking – these same synapses shrink. As a result, women tend to respond to stress and anxiety with overthinking and depression, whereas men biologically find it hard to process emotional pain and thus resort to substance abuse, violence or antisocial behaviour.

Men are more likely to externalise negative emotions through rage and anger than trying to deal with them CREDIT: ALAMY

So, whilst sadness may manifest itself more noticeably in the male of the species, this may not necessarily mean that men are less happy than women below the surface – a distinction Dr Pertusa is keen to point out.

 "Regarding the assumption that men are less happy than women, I am not sure things are so simple," says the psychiatrist. "There is a plethora of reasons why men might be more likely to commit suicide than women whilst not, on the whole, 'sadder’. And despite the differences in brain biology we are aware of, there may be other factors of which we are not."

Dr Michael Craig, a senior lecturer in the School of Psychology and Neuroscience at King's College, London, agrees  that it might be a mistake to simply look at the brain's mechanisms to pinpoint the reason behind the happiness gap: "From my research, I have found that men are predisposed to neurodevelopmental problems, such as autism, ADHD and addiction, and women tend to be more susceptible to affective disorders, such as Alzheimer’s or depression. "But socially it would seem that women are more likely to present these symptoms to their doctors.

"Therefore, although it seems that more women suffer from depression, the ‘stiff upper lip’ male mentality may be skewing these statistics. Rather than seeking help, men deal with their emotional pain through drug use and addiction – which can then exacerbate the issue further."

Although more women than men are diagnosed with depression, this may be because many men are embarrassed to seek help CREDIT: ALAMY

Which all brings us back to cultural – not biological – reasoning. 

The social divide in the gender's response to adverse emotion has been well documented, both academically and anecdotally. Lee Barnes, a life coach and male mentor, recognises the adverse influence that social expectations and restrictions can have on the male experience. An influence, the therapist tells me, that he believes exceeds the biological in severity.

 "My observation is that sadness in men is primarily triggered by the social and cultural expectations that are placed upon them," says Barnes. "Expectations that they can't possibly live up to. Men will always have just as many problems as women, but whereas it's acceptable for women to externalise emotion, our culture expects men to deal with them with ‘manly’ ease.

 "When you sit down with a man and discover his fears and vulnerabilities, you realise just how tender men actually are," Barnes continues. "40 per cent of my clients are men, and most of them cite feeling isolated. Isolated from their partners, from their passions and from their communities.

 "And this isolation leaves men feeling stuck and drained by their lives – some to an extent where they no longer wish it to be that way. And that is gender specific – sensitivity, vulnerability, trust, empathy – it’s all been educated out of men over time. So it's no wonder we are disconnected."

Lee Barnes believes that men feel more isolated than women CREDIT: ALAMY

Barnes believes that men decide to take their own lives due to this gender-specific sense of 'social isolation'. However, whilst the ONS suicide statistics show that men take their own lives at a rate of 16.8 suicides per 100,000 people (versus just 5.2 female deaths), the numbers concerning attempted suicides tell a vastly different story.

Women attempt suicide 3 to 4 times as often as men and, as Dr Michael Craig explains, it is simply because of the methods typically employed by each gender that more men become victims.

 "Men are more violent than women," says Craig. "We can see this when we look at suicides – men tend to pick more violent means to end their life, such as jumping off  buildings or in front of trains. Women choose overdoses and other means that don’t have the same sense of unavoidable finality about them."

However, whilst the suicide figures may have slightly exaggerated the difference in male and female depression, the fact remains that there are clear social rules and expectations that force men to repress or ignore complex emotions in a wholly unhealthy way.

Although more women attempt suicide, more men end up taking their own livesCREDIT: ALAMY

So is there a definite reason men seem 'less happy' than women?

 "The issue of ‘nature vs nurture’ is a fascinating and long-standing debate," says Dr Pertusa. "And science has only just begun to understand the interplay between our biology - the way we are hard-wired, determined by our genes - and the environment - parenting, social factors and so many other external influences.

 "These influences are extremely complex and differ from person to person. Although there are significant differences - both social and biological - in the way men and women experience and cope with depression, the individual factors are, in my view, far more important than gender itself."